Desiring Phantasy

Just a woman, who loves a man, having fun, and stumbling through life, the way we want to

Thursday 4 July 2013

Stress relief Belting to remember :)

I've been stressed, and taking it out on everyone around me. It had to end, that's what my Man whispered to me, when he came home from work.

Now on a normal day, I would have been arguing why I don't need spanking, and that I'm fine.

But those days are gone. I have decided I'm going to be honest with myself, and with my Man. I will admit to my desires, and to my needs, without being shy.



This is what I'm learning about myself. I need to be spanked, to stay calm, and centred. When I'm stressed, and my head is all over the place, a nice long spanking helps.

This is me. I need it. I want it. My Man needs it. My Man wants it.

So laid on the couch, he asked me to come over. I started to hesitate, but then I remembered my own words, held my head up, and went over, and laid myself across his lap.

He very gently pulled down my trousers, then lowered my panties, and started rubbing my already tingly ass. Then came the first smack, ouch, it was unexpected, and made me jump, but I stayed put. He started to smack, each cheek a few times, and then the next cheek a few times, and rubbed, and smacked, I could already feel the tension starting to leave my body, I got comfortable on his lap, and let him give me what was needed.

Slowly my ass was getting hotter and hotter, and could feel the stinging go right through me. He stopped, told me to go upstairs, and wait on the bed for him. I did as I was told, knowing that the belt was waiting for me.

I have a terrible love/hate relationship with his belt. I love it because it makes me feel he has the ultimate power over me. It's his belt, and his authority. Like I am his woman, and under his authority. I hate it, as even looking at him put his belt on in the morning makes me lower my eyes. If I think about it, I can feel the tingling in my ass.

As I laid there waiting, I thought about how lucky I am, that my Man, will do anything to help me, even if it's giving me the belting of a life time to relieve me of my stress, and calm me down.

He came in, and just looked at me.

Are you ready babe

aha

you know, I'm going to belt you really hard

aha

I want you to submit

aha

I want to admit that you need it

aha

that's not talking, tell me what you need babe

I can't

Yes you can, tell me what you need babe, and I'll give it to you

It took all my courage to say those words

I need you to spank me hard baby

Then that's what I'm going to give my baby

I heard the oh so familiar jingling of the belt being took off, and I braced myself, and that's how it started. Strap after strap fell on my ass, making me jump forward every time. Each stroke left a stinging pain in it's wake, and with every strike, I could feel the tension, and stress leave my body. He would alternate between lighter strikes, and really hard ones, that took my breath away. I moaned quietly in my pillow, and wriggled about, trying to find some comfort in it all. I wanted to yell STOP, please I'll be good, but then I remembered, this isn't discipline, this isn't punishment, this stress relief, so I would take myself back in to that head space, and let the spanking do it's job.

He didn't stop, I was a mess, I cried, and moaned, but not once did I say stop. I took it, all of it, and when I thought I couldn't take anymore, he gave me ten more really hard strokes, which made my ass feel like it's on fire.

He stopped, came over, started to rub my really sensitive ass, and kissed me on the back of the neck, and before I knew it, he slammed his hard cock, in one fluid movement in to my extremely wet pussy. I cried out, and then relaxed. He banged away, hard, till he came, then turned me round, and made sure I got what I needed. He played and rubbed, and squeezed, and tortured my pussy, till I came screaming, and falling apart around him.



What a stress relieving night :)

Tuesday 2 July 2013

Funny things........... Relationships!!!!

So I've been thinking about relationships, recently. How complicated they can get.




When we met, we had the most passionate relationship ever. We were all over each other, all the time. We kissed and got in to each others pants, anywhere, anytime, no matter who was there. We worked in the same place, and even got cautioned at work, for indecent behaviour, and got told to tone it down. It was great, we loved it, we didn't care who thought what, we just did what we wanted.

Then we got married, and things got complicated. Finances, living together, work, making a home, then wanting kids. It all put a huge strain on us. We coped, but the passion started to subside, and got replaced with everyday life. We still loved each other like day one, and on rare occasions, would still act like we did before, but mainly, we started to grow up, and take life seriously. We worked, and built a life, and had kids, and were happy. The typical 21st Century family, with kids and pets, and a mortgage.

We both missed it though, so when we decided to incorporate DD in to our marriage, the passion came back. I don't know what it was, but it was like a switch was turned, and a fire lit. We were having sex like teenagers, behind the door, or in the closet, or the car.

We were having fun. Then that started to get serious. In the world of DD, it's not supposed to be fun, it's supposed to be serious. Two Consenting Adults, Living within a Mutually Consensual Domestic Discipline Dynamic. Spankings are not supposed to be fun, It's discipline.

That's all well and good, but where is the fun ????

So we started to move away from it slowly. Starting to have fun again. Started to see things for what they are.

We both get turned on by spankings. Time to face the truth, and stop hiding behind a title.

We're having fun again. There is passion again. we're exploring, and opening up to one another. We're seeing each other as two people, and not just the person we live with, and raise kids with.

My brother is going through a divorce at the moment. It's been messy. My SIL, is a mess, and so is my brother. They've just hit rock bottom. So far away from each other, there is no end in sight. He says she's has no passion anymore, she says, he doesn't notice her anymore.

There is no specific roles in their lives. He does what he wants, she does what she wants, they come at each other 100mph, and break apart.

Did they have passion before? Yes lots, they were the talk of all other couples. Did they have fun with each other? More than any other couple I ever saw. Did they fuck each others brains out, any time they could? Hell Yeah

So what happened??

They lost each other. They forgot who they fell in love with. They stopped seeing each other. They stopped communicating, and having fun. They just became the everyday, couple next door.

I'm learning so much about myself, and my Man at the moment. I feel like we're really coming close, and loving each other. We've really come to realise how great it is to have changed the dynamic within which we live.

Is it the division and specification of the roles within our household, that gives us the strength, to solidify our relationship and marriage? Or does this kind of dynamic, give you the freedom, to be yourselves again, that brings back the spark in your life? Does it help to be honest about your feelings, and more sensitive to the feelings of your partner?

Do marriages, or relationships always start to go stale after a long time, people become complacent within their home, and stop trying as hard?

Whats the secret of a good relationship?

Monday 1 July 2013

So I flooded the bath

I had a great weekend. It was so much fun, and I was excited like a child at Christmas.

It all started on Saturday morning, just before my Man left for work, he told me, he's going to take me shopping for some clothes.

Now let me tell you, I'm materialistic, OK not that my life depends on it, But I absolutely love shopping for clothes. I just love to walk around the shops, and touch and feel every item, try them on, and twirl, and show off with it.

It makes me feel good, and fresh, and full of life.

So I spend my morning, cleaning and sorting the rugrats out, and met him for some "US" time :)

It was great, my Man never moans and groans over shopping, even if I go back to the same shop, to try the exact same top, for the third time, to walk out, and go back to the other place to buy the one, I saw first lol He walked with me for hours through the town, waited patiently whilst I tried everything on, in every shop, and politely paid for the items I chose, and even carried all the bags round. He even stopped at a fastfood chain, and let me have a bite to eat, and drink, and rest my feet, to only walk more afterwards. By the time we came home, he was all spent out, his feet hurt, and his arms were two inches longer from carrying my shopping.



I was in heaven, in clothes heaven, you know the place where all new clothes are born, and are laid across the living room couch, and being appreciated :)

I was happy, I would have been content with just laying on the sofa with my Man for the rest of the night, and just cuddling, and loving him. But he had other plans.

As we had a coffee, and just resting in the kitchen, he told me to go get ready, as we're going out tonight. I just looked at him like a spaced out zombie, wondering what he meant. He had further plans, he wanted me to dress up, in some of the new clothes, and wanted to take me out and show me off, so he said.

How much happier could I get this day. So excited like a little kid, I ran in to the bathroom, turned the bath on, and went to my room, to sort through the piles of clothes. Completely forgetting my bath, and everything around me. But by the time I remembered the bath, and ran downstairs, and opened the door, this is what I found




Yes, completely under water, all I could do was stare at it, and then I started to scream. Stupid me, in my excitement, I had completely forgotten, and now the water was running in the hallway.

Well my Man being the ever calm and collected person, walked in, takes one look at me, and one look at the bathroom, and starts to laugh.....

no not funny, so after I spent half an hour, and about ten towels, I manged to dry the floor, and finally get in the bath.

I got myself all cleaned and smelling nice, and shaved every part of my body to a smooth finish. Came out, and went upstairs to get dressed. My Man walks in and asks me to show myself, and I did, all of me, all hot and steamy, and smooth and hair free as the day I was born :) Of course I could see the bulge in his trousers growing, and standing to attention, which naturally got me more hot and steamy. You could feel the sexual tension between us.

He stood there watching me take my rings off, and get the cream out, and rub it all over me. He wanted me to do it slowly, and did lick his lips a couple of times. Until he could take it no longer and told me, If we don't leave soon, he won't be taking me anywhere, apart from under the covers, so we both hurried, and left.

Yes you might have guessed, in the rush, I forgot my rings. My wedding ring, which I never forget, was left behind on my bed. I felt terrible. I felt naked, and told him, and he just looked at me, and said

well I guess, I'm taking my girlfriend out tonight and not my wife.

And so the games started.

A bit of role play anyone?????

It's fun, let me tell you, it felt great. we played our part really well. We went to a restaurant, and played the newly "met" game, pretended we didn't know anything about each other, and got to "know" one another again. We looked in to each others eyes, and flirted, drank wine, and fed each other Pasta, played footsie, and even mentioned that we shall never tell our husband/wife about our meeting :)

It was an extremely exciting night. We acted like teenagers, and walked round the town, drinking in different pubs, and just holding hands and being silly.

On the way home, we drove past a funfair that had just come to town, and I mentioned I haven't been on a ride for a long time. So we stopped to just have a look around, and ended up on a couple of rides, which was really funny. He shot me some flowers, and bought me some sweets, and kissed me passionately in the middle of the fair.

By the time we came home, he couldn't wait to undress me, he dragged me upstairs, and as soon as the door was closed, he proceeded to take all my clothes off, and started to stroke me everywhere, and when he got to the right place, he decided to have a taste.

Most wonderful feeling:)

He opened up his drawer, and told me he's very sorry he didn't think of this before, and if he had, he would have told me to wear the plug before we went out, but it's not too late, and proceeded to turn me around, and insert it, and not even that gently. This made me giggle more than anything, but also found it a bit uncomfortable, but the feeling was gone quickly.

We made love, very passionately. It was more a need, a primal, animal need, and that's how we did it.



I'm learning new things about myself, and about my Man, and it's all so so exciting. I'm growing, we're growing, and evolving, and it's absolutely wonderful.

Saturday 29 June 2013

Playing with toys :)

I'm trying to be honest, and not hide. It's hard though. It's not the same as having a chat with a friend, and talking about sex. You make a joke and say little things, maybe blush, and move on.

This is different. I'm writing about the most intimate part of my life. About the true feelings and emotions, of a new and exciting journey we're on.

I'm excited, scared, embarrassed, and liberated all at the same time.

This is me, making fantasy, real.

I've had many fantasies over the years. It's the stuff that gets my blood pumping, it gets me hot, and I can feel it between my legs. That tingly feeling, that makes you want to open up, and let your Man take you, in all the ways possible.

I have read, and watched some porn. Know what turns me on. Somethings turn me on, but I wouldn't want to try them out, it scares me. But somethings, I'm fascinated with.

What you ask??

Well I have always been fascinated with any sort of anal play. I don't know why. It's strange really. But my Man is the same. He enjoys taking me this way. He enjoys coming up behind me, and bending me over the table, and pulling my pants down, and caressing my ass, and slowly sticking his fingers between my legs, and feel how wet I am. He likes to push me down, and push himself in, slow at first, but then hard. This turns me on, I can feel him, his power, his pleasure, his body.

I ordered a Plug recently. I had one of those conversations with a few friends, and decided to order one. It came in the post yesterday. I was burning red when the postman stood at my door, and I had to sign for it. I could feel the heat coming of my face, as if he knew whats inside. Then I put the package on the kitchen table, and stared at it for an hour. I messaged some friends, and told them it's there, and that I can't open it. I was encouraged, and so I ran upstairs, in my bedroom, closed the door, and locked it, and sat on my bed. Slowly I opened it, what a huge box, for such a small item.

I took it out, and was surprised by the weight of it. In a way it was beautiful. My sparkle loving child, was fascinated by the purple stone, and in a way I couldn't wait to try it out. I was all hot, and bothered, I could already feel that tingly feeling, right there in the core of me. Then there was knock on my door, and the rugrats wanted feeding. So quickly I put it all back, stuffed all the paper on top, and closed the box, and shoved it under my bed.

I wrote my Man, and told him it's here. He was really excited. If he could have, he would have been home straight away. But hey, life first, then play.

All day I talked to friends about it. I was nervous, and scared. Apprehensive about how it would work out. I had built it up so much in my head, what if I don't like it, or my Man, doesn't find it appealing.

I had forgotten some of my chores yesterday, and my Man wasn't happy. When we had a chat at night, he did say, that he will punish for not finishing my chores. He also asked where our little toy is. I explained where I had put it, and he went to search for it.

He told me to pull my pants down, and bend over the sofa, and wait for him. This is hard for me, I feel so exposed, but I complied. As I lay there waiting for him to come back, I was nervous, and wanted to run, and hide.

He came down, sat on the sofa, and patted his leg, indicating for me to climb on, so I did. He started to spank me, and telling me that I have been a naughty girl, that chores have to be done daily, and I shouldn't try to get out of things. As he smacks, he rubs and smacks and rubs, and then he asks me to go and get the spoon. I HATE the spoon, it's horrible, and it leaves little red round lumps on my ass. So I get up and pull my pants up, he says, NO, leave them round your ankles and walk to the kitchen. I'm extremely embarrassed, and put my eyes down, and follow his directions.

He again pats his lap and tells me to climb on, so I do, and he starts to really go to town on my poor red backside, I'm struggling to stay put, and squirm around, and ask him to slow down, but he doesn't, he intensifies, and I am rubbing myself against his leg, and knees, trying to find some relief, but this only defies my mind, as the rubbing is having a whole other effect on me.

Silly me, I'm getting turned on by this. Such a mind boggling sensation.

He stops, and starts to rub my poor sore ass. He rubs and tells me to be good, and try harder, and that he loves me. He lets me up, and asks me to get him some paper and a pen. OH NO, lines are in order, multiple rule break, always comes with lines, sat on my sore backside. So I did my lines, and came back.

He pats his leg again, and I'm not happy, baby I am sorry, really please no more, but he insists, so I climb over, he pulls my pants down, and rubs, and spanks slowly, not hard, it's just the right type of pain, and then I feel it, a cold sensation, and then a little bit of pressure. then a little bit more, and a bit more. I'm moaning and feeling very vulnerable. I feel exposed, and out of control, I try to pull away, and his strong arm, just keeps me in place. He pushed one more time, and I let out a little cry, and its in. He rubs some more, and says BEAUTIFUL, Purple really is your colour.

It was a strange feeling, sort of like an intrusion, but sexy. I felt embarrassed, and hot at the same time. He let me up, and told me, we're going to watch a film, and I'm not to remove it, touch it, or put my pants back on.

I had a whole hour an a half, to sit and ponder, and feel, and go through all sorts of emotions.

Wow, how can a little things like that, cause so many emotions in me.

The film finished, and he gets up, stands in front of me, and lowers his pants, I know what he wants, and I give him that pleasure, he stops me too soon, and draggs me upstairs.

Upstairs, he gently takes me, and starts to caress me, and rub me all over, and kiss me, and then he pulls me on top of him, and I comply. I ride him like never before. All the feelings of waiting, and pondering, and worrying and shame, were gone. It was a most wonderful feeling. Like I had the power to do to him what I wanted, but was reminded that he owned me, with being plugged.

He came all too soon, and I was left wanting, and needing. He looks at me, throws me off him, and on to my back, opens his drawer, and gets my other purple friend out, and proceeds to give me a multiple and extremely intense O.

We were laid in each others arms, and just drifting off to sleep, and he asks me how I feel.

All I could say was :

Satisfiabley satisfied.

Friday 28 June 2013

This is me....

So I took the plunge and decided to start this blog.

This will be hard for me, as I've never spoke about these things before. Not to RL friends, not to anyone. But I want to be brave. I want to start exploring, and maybe finding some new exciting things to experiment with.

I'm not very interesting really, have a normal life, and a normal husband. We live a slightly different lifestyle. We live within a Domestic Discipline dynamic. He's the Head of our House, and makes the rules, and I follow. He does this with our family in mind, and If I break the agreed upon rules, I will be disciplined. This is part of who we are, and how we live.

But recently, life is changing for us. We are becoming more in tuned with our needs. Being more open about our fantasies, and needs and wants in our sexual life. We are starting to experiment, and explore new sexual needs. But we are new, and only just starting to look at things in a different light.

This blog, is about us, stepping out, and admitting we have needs, and wants, that only open and honest discussion will help fulfil.

I'm hoping to be able to be honest with myself, and open up to my desires. To explore, without shame, and to find what works, and doesn't work, without feeling weird, and alienated.

So please come and help me explore. Bring me ideas, and experience. Help me find my inner sex god, and unleash it.